Diversion Alert!

Life is like taking a drive on the road to Hana.

My husband and I recently vacationed on the island of Maui, Hawaii. While there we undertook the experience of the one “must do” excursion on the island – drive the road to Hana.

The anticipated journey began early one morning as we set out in our rented Jeep, recommended guide book in hand referencing all the points of interest (and the hazards) along the way. The drive which, by the way, is an all-day event to traverse the 40-some miles of narrow road, one-lane bridges (46 to be exact) just wide enough for a Jeep, and endless curves - not literally, of course, just 600 curves plus or minus…double that for round trip!

With this excursion, it’s more about the journey than the destination.

Now I have to admit, when I write I get a little thrill when finding the perfect word, and Hana is the perfect word for this particular journey. In Hawaiian it means work, and in Japanese it means beautiful. If you drive the road to Hana you will find it’s the perfect fit. The work required to maneuver the curves, at the same time does not fail to provide the beauty of stunning views and magnificent scenery; or, the little unexpected surprises around certain corners. None of which can be adequately described or justified through description or photos. It must be experienced.

However, at the same time, the road to Hana is not for the faint of heart. Many choose, for fear of the potential treachery of the narrow road and windy curves, not to make the drive and never experiencing the beauty of the journey. They have truly missed out believing the risk is not worth the reward.

So, up for the challenge, my husband and I, with the direction of the guide, set out knowing mile by mile what lay ahead and proceeded picking and choosing our points of interest along the way. Intrigued and unable to resist, we made certain stops the book called “Diversion Alerts!” happy to accept the penalty of added time those stops produced (hey, we were in Hawaii!). We found some of those excursions to be more rewarding than others. But then isn't that how journeys go?

Finally arriving at Hana, we found a less than fulfilling end to the journey (the guide had warned us). Hana is an uninteresting village having no main street or town center – not even a shop to purchase the requisite “I Survived the Road to Hana” T-shirt. It is hardly the "paradise" one would expect considering the drive to get there, leaving us asking ourselves, This is it?! Then again, as I said, we'd been warned.

Life is like that drive. And yet, for believers, unlike the road to Hana, it's about both the journey and the destination.

God is wanting to do a beautiful work in us as we make life's journey. It is His desire we trust the narrow road, winding curves and single lane bridges are worth the time involved because there is beauty to be had along the way and awaiting at the end. What He has prepared for us at the end of our journey will not leave us asking, Really, is this all there is?, because Paradise actually is awaiting those who have allowed Christ to be their guide.

In addition, guide Book God has provided both forewarns us of the hazards ahead and assures us of the beauty along the way as well. He encourages us to be on guard never knowing when we will encounter those one-lane bridges slowing us down and eliciting caution, or what we will discover around the next curve, or when we will face something head-on along the narrow road leaving no room to pass. Sometimes blessings await us around those corners, or in the diversions, and sometimes trials. We walk the road in faith. And we must be careful not rob ourselves of those blessings that await because we selfishly refuse to sacrifice the time a diversion may take.

Though there are many similarities between life and the road to Hana, we can be grateful we only go one way. There is no return trip. The Bible assures us we are journeying through this world to an end God has promised - heaven and eternal life. He assures us this world isn't real life. Real life is in the Spirit and life in the Spirit enhances our journey and produces joy even with the single lanes, narrow bridges and unpleasant diversions....until we reach our heavenly Paradise.

We also have the promise of His everlasting presence and abundant life; not just at the end of our journey but in the journey. This sometimes amazing, sometimes hard journey is just that – a journey. I can either enjoy the scenery or focus on the curves. I have chosen not to opt-out, taking it all in, the good with the bad, knowing in the end my journey will have been more rewarding than the road to Hana.

I’m going to trust in His promise to walk with me along the way; to never abandon me on this narrow road; and work through the curves, knowing He will turn those diversions into blessings. Because, unlike Hana, He has promised the beauty of heaven at the end of my road. Oh, the joy of such a promise!

God will…give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified. Isaiah 61:3

Perseverance

Recently, when asked to speak to a group of women on the topic of perseverance, I didn't have to dig very deep to realize I have first hand knowledge of the subject. After all that's what brought me to the place of blogging (My Story).

Before I felt qualified to speak on the subject, I first felt the need to clarify my understanding of the word persevere and its close relation, endure. Because, as I've found, our English language uses these two words interchangeably. Assuming they are two different words I pressed on to determine how they are so closely related.

After some time of what felt like chasing my own tail (because believe me at times it was a circular path to separate these two words as they referenced each other to define each other), the "light bulb" moment came. I found the above pictured quote from Charles Spurgeon. Ah, ha! I said to myself. That's it! Because I have found when words are used interchangeably, yet have distinct definitions, the power in both words becomes diminished as the lines between them become blurred.

Charles Spurgeon's little snail open the door of my understanding. This is how I described it to the women as I spoke to them:

I persevered in preparing to speak to you so now you must endure!

Like the snail on its way to the ark, to persevere means there must be constant forward motion. Sometimes that means literal forward motion and other times it's merely sheer determination not to give up.

Drawing from my past, my highly motivated efforts to wean off the drug poisoning my body was driven by pure perseverance, while endurance enabled me to withstand the effects of withdrawal. Unfortunately the process of drug withdrawal from benzodiazepines requires both. There is no way around it. There are ways to mitigate the effects, but there will be the trial of perseverance with endurance.

The old adage, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger" certainly held true for me in this case. Withdrawal from this insidious drug is dangerous. It can kill. Through perseverance and endurance I came out stronger than I ever believed possible.

Having my faith strengthened through perseverance is primarily what I wanted to share as I spoke to the women. My experience is nothing compared to what others have had to persevere and endure. Everyone at one time or another will persevere through something. Right? That is one of our common bonds of life. If we aren't learning in the process we completely miss the opportunity for growth (that forward motion of life),  and risk stagnating in bitterness, or worse.

I've found life itself is the process of persevering, haven't you? It's what we learn through the process that produces the lasting, positive life changing effects. And for believers it is faith building because God has promised to meed our every need.

Please, I don't want you to get the idea that I stood before those women and painted a maudlin picture of the martyr's view of perseverance. Quite the contrary. I've learned some beautiful lessons about what it means to persevere...and it's not been about me.

What I've learned and continue to learn is, God is bigger than anything I must persevere or endure. It was His powerful presence meeting me moment by moment then and His continued presence meeting me daily now as I persevere toward the future He has assured me of - step by step, day by day, like the snail.

Are you enduring something today. Allow Christ to give you the strength to persevere.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Philip. 4:13

On The Lighter Side

Submitted for your enjoyment this Christmas from my alter ego...Penelope.

Penelope’s Paltry Predicament

    Penelope’s previously prickled persona passed in polite pretense as she pondered her prospective purpose. Ah, ha! She proclaimed. A party of perfectly pharoanic proportions would positively placate my pained perspicacity!

    Having made peace with her previous preturberance, Penelope prepared to plan the perfect party, choosing poinsettias as the pivotal point. Pondering the possibilities of pigmentation for said party, Penelope picked a perfectly profound product of the pink pigment – not too pale – as is her preference for the priority of poinsettias.

    Prevailing upon her local purveyor of products, Penelope planned to purchase plentiful poinsettias of said pigmentation. Upon her arrival at the purveyor’s place of production an unplanned pang of her previous perturbation proceeded to persecute her psyche. Proceeding to pace the passages, Penelope’s panic produced premeditations of presently perishing. Such a predicament prohibited the purchase of poinsettias and practically poisoned Penelope’s preference of her previously perfectly pigmented posies.

    Perchance, what purpose would such premeditations present themselves you plea?

    Alas, the plenary of said purveyor’s paltry product of pigmented poinsettias was primarily….leopard print!

    Merry Christmas! And may your holiday's perspectives prevail to point to the true meaning of the season....the coming of the Savior of the world - Jesus!

    And if you don't know who He is or what He means in your life, ask the God of all creation to present HIS gift this year and reveal Jesus to you.

Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!

2 Corinthians 9:15

Let Go and Hold On

     I have a favorite Bible verse. You may be familiar with it.

Psalm 46:10

Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!

     After reading it in several translations, including footnotes, I've written it in the margins of all my Bibles like this:

     "Be still, cease striving, let go, relax, and know that I am God..."

     But there are times, admittedly, when it adamantly reminds me:

     SIT STILL, SHUT UP, GET YOUR HANDS OFF IT, BREATHE, AND TRUST GOD TO TAKE CARE OF IT!

     There have been many times in my life when I just can't seem to let go and trust God to handle my problems. I want to get in there and manipulate, maneuver, manage the situation toward my ultimate goal - which seldom is without selfish motives. By "selfish" I don't mean with bad intentions. Selfish, in most cases for me means, when you boil it all down, I'm thinking my outcome would far exceed God's purposes. Because, of course, I would plan the final outcome down to the finest detail, fully intact before I would ever step back and "sit still". A true pit of quicksand to be sure! Because once I've stepped in that direction it's hard to turn back.

     It can be impossibly difficult to be still when everything around you seems to be shaking and crumbling. I know. I live in earthquake country. What is the first thing most people want to do when the ground begins shaking? RUN! That instinct often leads to a poor choice of direction and more harm than had they stayed put.

      Being still is not usually what we want to do. We want to be busy fixing things, making them better. But that is not what God asks of us.

     The next phrase in my retranslated verse is "cease striving". The word "strive" is no longer a common word in the English language. If we were to read it as "struggle against, oppose, or resist" it may help. It's natural for us to struggle against, oppose and resist that which is uncomfortable. Our initial and visceral response is to make the situation more comfortable. But here God is asking us to do the opposite of our natural inclinations - don't do anything when we feel like we need to do something! This is not an easy choice to make. It's counter-intuitive; a term I became all too familiar with some years ago.

     If you've read my earliest posts, you are aware this blog began as a testament to surviving benzodiazepine withdrawal. If not, you can read the full explanation in My Story. In a nut-shell, for me, the weaning process from this drug caused me to become very sick for a few days following each reduction of the dosage, followed by a relatively "normal" few days, followed by a sudden rapid decline. It was that decline which became the signal for the next reduction. Discussing that pattern with my daughter led her to interject the term counter-intuitive. And she was absolutely right. It was counter-intuitive to do something that would make me feel worse when I was getting worse. But it never failed to be the right thing to do. Just as within the context of this one simple verse of the Bible, God is saying to be still, calm and not to struggle - even though it feels counter-intuitive - because He's got my back. Even though at the time taking that step of faith may feel as if I'm stepping into an endless free-fall, God has promised to be there to catch me. He IS God! He will do the same for you as well.

     Next, as if that isn't enough, He asks us to "let go". Our human comprehension screams it's illogical to let go when we don't know what will happen next. We want answers, we want to see what's coming before we "let go". Just try to pry a toy out of the grip of a baby's hand without offering something better - not gonna happen! At least it won't happen without great struggle and loud protest. Isn't that how we respond to God when He's encouraging us to let go of something we've been holding on to? We don't understand how freeing, how healing letting go can be until we've made the exchange because it means trusting Him to supply that which is infinitely better. And what He offers is always SO much better than what we've held on to.

     And finally, He wants us to do all of that while relaxed - without stress, completely calm and quietly. As I see it, there is only one way we can possibly do that, and that is to do it with the understanding from the remainder of the verse....KNOWING that He is God. Knowing that HE is greater than anything a "nation" can provide, and greater than anything on "earth". We can choose to look to human resources or the resources of earth but we will do that to our detriment. God, the Creator of it all, is greater than it all. He has the resources to provide for our every need, doing it in a more lavish and generous way than we can imagine. AND, He has promised to do so. We may renege on our promises but God never does. He can't. It's impossible for Him to go against His nature. Is that comforting or what?

     So when my world is shaking and about to come apart at the seams, I remind myself to be still, cease striving and struggling, let go and relax, knowing He is God, let Him be God, open my hand and release it giving it to Him - regardless of what "it" is. And as the first verse of the same Psalm says, He will be (as He always is) my place of refuge and my immediate help when I need it. If I don't run, if I don't panic, if I remain calm and still, He will be my help...

     Let go of all else...and hold onto Him.

Getting Real

PITY PARTY

OF

ONE PLEASE

Momentarily facing something which felt unbearable, I jumped on, or rather into, the "Pity Pot" (I admit I went ALL the way in), and began stewing in fear, doubt and self-pity.

So as long as I'm getting real, here’s where I found myself...

Truthful Confession: I'm prideful, helpless, hopeless and weak. I had come to the (prideful)  conclusion, after surmounting an obstacle as large as the one I faced (helplessly) a few years ago, that I could conquer just about anything without fear or doubt (hopeless), knowing the strength I'd discovered was not my own (weak), but the strength of faith in my Christ.

 I failed and here's why.

Without going into the whole history of my medical, physical and spiritual journey (you can read about that in My Story), suffice it to say, I found myself facing yet another trip down the road of withdrawal from a brief need for pain medication due to a couple of medical issues. I knew withdrawal was certain due to the way my body is wired. However, I also knew the medication I had been on does not cause the sever withdrawal symptoms I experienced with benzodiazepines (I wrote an analogy of that struggle called Benny). Yet, in a moment of weakness, I felt as if the ground would quake, open up, and swallow me whole. When in reality it was only going to be a small tremor. Nothing more than one of those annoying speed bumps of life we all encounter. Yet in an easy nano-second I'd pulled out the Pity Pot, climbed in, and gotten comfortable!

How had I fallen so far?

I realize now getting in that Pity Pot was a ridiculous choice because I knew (really knew) I would probably only loose a few nights of sleep and that would be about it...nothing compared to the horrors of benzodiazepine withdrawal. Seriously NOTHING! But I was feeling sorry for myself, I was feeling weak and self-indulgent - the real problem. See the "I's" and "self"? Enough said.

When a song I hadn't heard in years popped up from my playlist my perspective was readjusted as it gave me the proverbial smack upside the head. The song, "He Walked a Mile", by Clay Cross, contains the simple chorus that reset my perspective:

And every time I close my eyes

I see the nails, I hear the cries

He did not keep Himself away

He was no stranger to my pain

He walked a mile in my shoes

He walked a mile

Reality check! A life's totality of pain and suffering does not even come close to the sum of Jesus' pain and suffering; something He did, resulting in His death, not only for my salvation but to identify with me as well. As the lyrics say, He was (is) no stranger to my pain. He knows. He understands. Even Jesus - God Himself - prayed to be released from that horrid experience prior to His crucifixion. Yet He did not turn from it, and now we know He understands my/our weaknesses; not in order to diminish any suffering we may experience, but for us to have an understanding of His compassion toward us. Could He put an immediate stop to our suffering? Certainly! From my personal experiences those which He allows are to benefit and strengthen personal weaknesses which, if left untried, will threaten my faith. And there is nothing more the enemy of my soul likes to do than to strike at my weaknesses.

Suddenly I felt His compassion filling me with a renewed sense of victory. I had to ask myself, If He had given me the strength, faith, endurance and fortitude to withstand benzodiazepine withdrawal, why would He not provide for anything else? A few night's lost sleep and some minor discomfort were nothing! Why was I sitting in the Pity Pot? At that point, if I'd shared my whole story with anyone else, I'm sure they would have looked at me, laughed, and said, "So, explain it to me again, exactly what's your problem?"

That felt precisely like what had happened. The words from the chorus virtually screamed What's your problem?! to me, provoking an instant perspective and attitude adjustment.  Well, maybe it took an hour or so. OK, I'll admit, I had to "chew" on it a while before I realized I'd lost perspective, forgotten the victory and had begun to sink; just like Peter when Jesus called him out of the boat to walk on the water. Just like Peter, I looked at myself and I began to sink deeper and deeper into the Pity Pot.

So, with the strength which only comes from Christ, I got up off (or out of, as was my case) the Pity Pot, refocused on Him, and walked away with not even a trail of toilet paper stringing along behind me...because that's just how thorough my Jesus is!

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Philippians 4:13